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Book of Vladimir Antonov "How God Can Be Cognized. Autobiography of a Scientist Who Studied God"

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Sexual Self-Identification

When I was 5 years old in this life, our family lived in one of the terrible communal flats, which Vladimir Vysotskiy mentions in his song: “… for thirty-nine rooms — there was only one lavatory*.” Apart from constantly coughing and expectorating consumptives, I remember one of the inhabitants: Kuzya, a tomcat.

He was a little kitten taken in. Then he grew up and suddenly… — to the surprise of everyone — gave birth to several kittens. He turned out to be a female…

I was stupefied the most, because I could not solve this problem. So I kept asking the adults about it:

“And Kuzya himself, does he know that he is — a she-cat?…”

… However, behind this childish naivety of mine, there was one of the most interesting problems of biology and psychology: sexual self-identification, i.e. relating oneself to a certain sex.

We come to know from our upbringing that our material bodies belong to a certain sex. Parents call us, dress us, and comb us accordingly. They also say that we are of one sex and those others are of another.

Nevertheless, the problem is that sometimes the perception of one’s own sex conflicts with this knowledge.

For example, a person objects internally to his or her evident anatomic signs since childhood. Sometimes it may be related to remembrance of the previous life in a body of the opposite sex. In this case such a protest disappears with time. But in other cases the protest becomes stronger with one’s puberty. Attempts to behave “properly” or “as one should”, including “normal marriage” leads to inner and outer discomfort that can be tremendous sometimes. These are events of inversion (morbid perversion) of sexual self-identification. Since these incidents are always traced from childhood, there are no doubts that such inversion is of the congenital category.

The mechanism of distortion of sexual self-identification was intensively studied by scientists during those decades, especially in Germany (G.Dörner and others; see in [23]). It was discovered that the brain of a fetus and of a maturing child develops non-uniformly. Tissues of various brain parts ripen in a certain sequence. There are genetically fixed terms of differentiation and formation of their cells. And during these terms, which are called critical, the corresponding brain parts are extremely vulnerable to damaging influences. If an injury is done, its consequences remain for the whole life.

For example, it was discovered that there are two specific cerebrum centers — male and female — that are responsible for sexual self-identification in animal organisms and in humans too. Various damaging factors — hormonal, medicinal or even such as severe illness, strong negative-emotional stress, etc. of pregnant woman at the time of the critical period of fetus development — can entail abnormalities of fetus’ brain development that will manifest brightly only after puberty [10-15,23]. Such people are doomed to form a part of sexual minorities, to become homosexual or bisexual (it depends on the severity of the injury).

… But there is another mechanism of the formation of homosexuality and other sexual deflections. It is the conditioned reflex.

… In order to understand it, we first need to discuss the pubescence stages.

… In fact, a child (normally) has no inclination to sexual intercourse at all. There is no erogeneity of genitals either or it is minimal, though blood filling of the cavernous bodies may happen occasionally. On the contrary, there is natural erogeneity of the mouth, among other organs, which stimulates an inclination for mother’s milk nutrition [6]; this was first noted by S.Freud [16].

And only at puberty — under the influence of the production of sex hormones — the erogeneity of the external genital organs gradually develops. But (and this is important!) the inclination to coitus appears not at this time, but only after several years.

This second stage of the development of sexuality is called the stage of undifferentiated adolescent sexuality. At this age the sexual interest only begins to develop: boys talk over sex subjects, girls often “try themselves” by sexually teasing men — it is interesting for them to see: “what will happen…” But the prospect of really beginning of a sexual life is usually scary for them at this age. This is understandable: the process of anatomical maturing of the human reproductive system under the influence of sex hormones lasts for years.

The third stage of the development of sexuality is sexual maturity. It starts for people of both sexes with a real urge for sexual intercourse. At this age, in all the individual male species studied in this respect and in men there appears, for the first time, the innate reaction of sexual arousal to their species-specific (i.e. peculiar to this species) key sexual signals. For insects and mammals, except primates, these signals are odorous substances secreted by the female genitals (sex pheromones). Birds and primates have visual signals. In case of primates, including humans, such key sexual signal for males is a view of the female’s genitals*.

… Within the theme of this chapter the most interesting subject is the stage of undifferentiated sexuality: when the proper sexual orientation has not fully manifested yet, but sexual arousals, which are often accompanied by masturbation and orgasms, take place. It is at this age that the sexual conditioned reflexes may appear, sometimes so strong that they remain for the rest of life accompanying the normal sexuality or even displacing it completely.

In this way such sexual abnormalities as fetishism, zoophilia (sexual attraction to animals), masochism, necrophilia, and many cases of homosexual attractions are formed. I succeeded in verifying it in research on people [23] and proving it experimentally [23,27].

For example, I raised male dogs with various forms of sexual inversions that displaced the normal sexuality in their maturity. Such distortions developed through the mechanism of the conditioned reflex, provided that in their early age the dogs did not have adequate contacts with coevals of their species [23,27].

As to homosexuality, I managed to provide for the first time an integrated concept of this abnormality, despite the fact that it may develop in different ways [23].

* * *

In those years, the penal code of the USSR contained an outrageously absurd and wicked article that had been added through an order given personally by Stalin. It reflected the absurdity and criminality of the regime at that time: the article declared punishments in the form of imprisonment in concentration camps for many years for men who had a homosexual attraction and formed homosexual couples.

I was the first scientist in the USSR who stood up — from the scientific positions — for theirs rights. Precaution required that I put the name of a known sexologist professor A.M.Svyadosch on my first publication [44]*. Only later I published my own book [23].

Nevertheless I fell under investigation.

It turned out that I — a scientist conducting questioning among homosexuals — was suspected to be a homosexual who used questionnaires to establish new personal homosexual contacts…

Then God showed me two opposite types of investigators.

One of the investigators was — by his vile features — a criminal.

… Well, who does become an employee of the state power structures? The “healthy” part of their contingent includes people who are ready to sacrifice themselves against social evil for the other’s good. However, others go there for the sake of satisfying their most vile aggressive and sadistic inclinations “on legal ground”! It is they who torture their victims with pleasure! It does not matter to them whether the suspected person is really guilty. They are not interested in justice, but only in their desire to humiliate, to torment, and to destroy others! When you are in their grip — even if you have never heard about what you are imputed of — there is no way out! That is because discharge of the suspected is not in the plans of such incarnate devils. They are worried only about personal sadistic satisfaction.

… And one of them started to interrogate me…

But soon the chief officer of the criminal investigation department interfered. He promptly understood the situation, sent the investigator-devil out, asked me some questions using non-verbal suggestion (see below), got fully satisfied with my answers, determined that I had “medical” handwriting, requested me to write an explanatory note (that I am a scientist), closed the file, and let me go.

… And the penal prosecution of people with sexual deviations in Russia was repealed.* (Except for cases of sexual seduction of infants and sexual coercion, of course).


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